


11, 13, 21

by kuro49



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Canonical Character Death, F/M, POV Second Person, brief mentions of team hot dads
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-01
Updated: 2014-06-01
Packaged: 2018-02-03 01:45:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1726601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kuro49/pseuds/kuro49
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>If you ever suspected yourself to be in love with Chuck, it is only because you hate him in equal measures.</p>
            </blockquote>





	11, 13, 21

**Author's Note:**

> This was actually supposed to be a Chuck/Mako/Raleigh buuuuut Mako and Chuck wanted their own story.

 

Chuck Hansen

 

You’re not alone in fighting this war but it often feels this way.

When she takes you apart with her hands, you wonder if this is going to be worse than the time you woke up to the sensation of kissing the Marshal with tongue and teeth, him with a reverence for your father you never imagine the man to have for anyone, let alone his second in command.

When she takes you apart with her tongue and her teeth that graze like blades, you wonder whether this is going to be the last time before another Kaiju alarm takes you from her side. And when she throws you down on the Kwoon mats, you wonder whether you’re banging the nails on your own proverbial empty coffin (because you’re not as naïve as to believe that your burial grounds won’t be the Pacific Ocean after all).

Metal into wood. Metal into wood.

Splinters snagging, blood in the center of the palms of your hands as she touches the end of her bō to your throat like a brush of her lips.

“You win.”

You don’t lose but if you do, it is to her. And with the way you admit to it, even if it’s just to see that tilt to her mouth, it is defeat. She loves that she does, and you love that she can. You swipe away the end of her bō from your throat, she wipes the sweat from her temples with the back of her hand, and gives you room to get on your feet.

“3-3.”

Down in the Marianna’s trench where only the Breach lights the way for Striker and Gipsy both, you feel that you’re finally not alone. You think about a lot of things in those last moments with Stacker’s head as the other half of your own.

Even if it is missed opportunities when it comes to you and your father and saying goodbyes, you reckon that this will change a thing or two.

You steady yourself, and you remember her gripping her bō in a vice.

Even if it’s only because she tolerates you like you tolerate her when there is no finesse to her control and she is striking to maim on those Kwoon mats the two of you have made a home out of, you think you love Mako Mori even if it is just a little bit.

You detonate the payload, and you feel the explosion on your skin.

 

 

Mako Mori

 

You’re a stranger in your own skin, hoping, for days and hours and minutes and then seconds now, that it wouldn’t end the way it does.

But you’re not so naïve as to think that you’ll be getting another family from this blast (like you’ve gotten sensei, Tamsin and stories of a woman named Luna Pentecost from Onibaba). You’re not so naïve but you’re hopeful even though you know it doesn’t work this way.

And you would know, you’ve been up for days and nights remembering that singular event that changed your life.

You also remember his.

Except your saviour is a Jaeger and his is his father. You wanted yours even though you’ve never known of it, and he wanted his even though he has never wanted to be at the cost that it is. Scissure kills many, mothers and fathers and children alike. Onibaba does the same. In one, Chuck is left without a mother. In the other, you are left without your mother and your father.

In this, you’re about to lose it all.

And to tell sensei _I love you_ , in those three words, is inadequate.

If you can’t drift with a man like Stacker Pentecost, then only 愛しています comes close.

You have Raleigh in your head, your sensei on one of the last comm. channels, Chuck is saying goodbye to his father in ways only the Hansens know how. The words don’t come to him, and the words only come to you because the world doesn’t need another Chuck Hansen.

If you ever suspected yourself to be in love with Chuck, it is only because you hate him in equal measures. You don’t forget the way he lands flat on his back, black Kwoon mats a contrast with the freckles you only notice when he bites and you bite harder, where every kiss is made with teeth or there’s none at all.

He may have lost to you but those losses are nothing when compared to the ones you will endure. You don’t forget him is what is really the case when you, and by extension your Jaeger, is being taken apart in the Pacific Ocean.

When he takes himself apart to clear a path for you, you feel as though the explosion is being set across your skin.

 

XXX Kuro

 


End file.
